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09/26 – Day 308: Work + Passion = Happiness

10 Oct

There are those days that suck the happiness in me. There are those days that were too great. Today, I am positive after I go bruhaha of how crappy my yesterday was.

Oh well, we finally decided on our new work schedule… and it’s awesome. Weekends off!!! Yes! 12am – 9am — not bad at all. 🙂

I feel so guilty not able to help the new Red Cross Youth officers in their transition year. I guess it’s not easy to let go of something that has been part of your system and today I decided to go back to where my heart belongs. Thanks to my new schedule, I can balance work and passion. My work and my passion are not the same you know that’s why I feel so AMAAAAAZING that I can be working and then go back to my life as a Red Cross volunteer! 🙂

I am feeling the last quarter of the year work slump. Here I go again on thoughts of resigning and finally move to somewhere far away from my comfort zone and live the fast life. (Be careful what you wish for, I say.)

Am I ready? I guess I will if I really need to.

I am not saying my work is crappy. I learned to love it, or should I say enjoy it. I love working with people, enjoyed being with the SME team as we get along so well, I love doing those mentoring sessions especially if our scores show significant improvement. And I always say, one’s scorecard does not define him or her. Work performance can be behavioral, some just have personal problems to struggle, demotivation — just like me on random days and well — luck. Blah. I am tired of talking about work… it bores me. haha

Anyways, life is doing well right now. It’s okay, nothing really great is happening but it’s something one can be grateful of. I still don’t have a lovelife to boot but at least I am inspired. 🙂
But how long will I settle for less if I know deep within myself that I am made to be better than who I am today?

I know that my passion is in Red Cross, serving people, all the inspiring talks and leadership trainings bring sheer joy but I know in reality that it won’t provide the lifestyle that I want. Yes, it’s a noble decision to live serving others but then I also have a dream life that I want to live. Cars, a house and all the dream vacations… oh well.

Whatever makes me happy, I’ll go. I’ll choose later on if it’s the life I really wanted. 🙂

I want to be a volunteer again, I don’t know until when but I just want to be. My future seems to be jaded as of the moment especially of some plans. I don’t know if I am meant to stay or live away from Philippines. While there’s uncertainty on what the future brings, I’ll stay for a while and be that fish who swims together with the tide and let time and fate decides what will happen next. I decided to go back to where my heart is because I know it will help me decide on what I really want. At least I’ll bring great memories with me incase I will leave. (If I really need to leave… 🙂 )

I know some of my posts were a bit intriguing but I just don’t want to talk about it until every thing is A-OKAY.

Oh the hassles of citizenship issue and whatever, just the thought of it — confuses me.

Anyways, I am positive. This too shall pass — all the confusion, the daunting questions of self discovery and all the crazy things life has to offer… it’s all part of a grander plan.

Thanks Lord for a dynamic and crazy life I am living. I trust you and thy will be done. Whatever tomorrow brings, I’ll be there… with a wide grin in my face and arms wide open.

Live. Laugh. Hmmmm… LOVE. 🙂

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Posted by on October 10, 2012 in life, work

 

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